welfare bum

Successfully missing the point since 1977.

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

we don't hate traffic, we ARE traffic



on my recent trip to vancouver, i took part in an event called critical mass - essentially hundreds of cyclists getting together and riding slowly through the city's streets, downtown area and essentially everywhere to protest pollution and promote awareness of alternate forms of transportation.

i just got a kick out of the fact that i essentially got to be a big pain in the ass to a ton of commuters. at this particular point in the ride, we were at the top of the granville bridge (i think). apparantly when you get to the top of a bridge you are supposed to stop, get off your bike and lift it up above your head. there was a pissed off dude in a jaguar that laid on the horn for about 30 seconds solid. now of course with several hundred protestors all he got in response was loud cheers and laughs.

i would really hate this if i was a driver.

but i wasn't. i was on my bike.

well ... my brother's girlfriend's bike.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

shopper's museum?



i see this shopper's drug mart every time i drive home pretty much. if you catch it at the right angle (which unfortunately, my camera is not really capable of getting) it looks like it could be the biggest, fanciest shopper's drug mart in the world.

of course, there's a good chance that i'm the only person who thinks that.

Friday, August 19, 2005

where did they get that car


Thursday, August 18, 2005



a tall drink of water Posted by Picasa

why not?


Wednesday, August 17, 2005

a tour of the office...



a bit more of an optical illusion when you look at it like this. on my way to work i see these two speed limit signs sitting beside each other every day. the first thought that always goes through my mind is "keep your speed in between 70 and 80"

perhaps a little less exciting to those who don't do the trip every day. this one's from the 427 and QEW.



then the traffic begins - check the cars in front, check the speed. hooray for 0 km/h (for anyone american reading this - at 1.6 km for every mile... i think that equates to approximately 0 mph).

this incredibly rapid rate of speed makes it possible for me to take such wonderful photographs. i tried to get good pictures of people picking their noses - but unfortunately those ones came out blurry. maybe next time.


then i sits my arse down at my desk - here we see two zip-loc bags of cereal - both of them cheerios. why do i need two bags you might ask? that's none of your business.

on top of the PC you'll see Kyle Broflofski eyeing up a plastic sheep.

just because.

and then there's a roll of paper towels, a bunch of tupperware and a stapler - because every cubicle dweller needs a stapler.



aaaaand here's the other side of my desk - two boxes of cereal hidden behind my monitor, my frankenstein sock monkey and my dollar store goldfish mug - complete with Terrence and Phillip key chains.

notice the papers scattered all over the desk? you would think those were important papers, but really it's just got org-chart type diagrams that i keep drawing because i need to explain shit to people over and over and over again so they get the point. and rather than use the same one, i keep making new ones. AND if you keep lots of paper on your desk, people think you're really busy.

and there's a laptop on my desk. i don't use it for anything, and the IT guys don't know i have it, but i think that's the point.


and here's the box of Golden Grahams i keep behind my computer - because some people think that three boxes of cereal is too much to have on one desk.

they're dumb.

rock on.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

he was once a little green slab of clay....


i find that the strangest things inspire me to be artistic - be it odd road signs, car accidents, goofy looking people....


or a thing in a jar

this thing is so awesome - i need to make one.  i'd put it in the lobby of the office building, just in view of the security cameras so that the receptionist would have something to confuse her all day (other than breathing).

Monday, August 15, 2005

propaganda


Database of North Korean Propaganda - this is beautiful. i saw a news special about the severity of the North Korean propaganda and the horrendous governmental structure. the really insane thing is that Kim Jong Il has actually taken steps to start a new system of counting years starting at the year Kim Il Sung was born.

but doesn't he look fly in those sunglasses?

limecat is not pleased


limecat is not pleased.

http://limecat.net/

he apparantly does not like people linking to his picture.  meh.

Sunday, August 14, 2005

the best thing since stacking pigs


my old boss once said that getting executives to do anything meaningful or productive was kind of like hearding cats.

give it a try...

well, the hearding cats that is, not the executive thing...

was it smoke?


i seem to remember once watching a movie with Harvey Keitel, i don't remember the actual plot to the movie but the part of the movie i remember was a focus on one point where he was looking through this photo album with some other dude and it literally had thousands of photographs of this one street corner where this cigarette shop was. he took a new photo from the exact same spot at the exact same time every day - noting to himself the vast differences from day to day, where most people may only notice that it's the same block over and over again, his point was the people, the expressions, the weather, the cars. it was always the same place, but always a different picture.


i've often thought of undertaking a task like that. one thought that always came to mind was the Compass traffic signs that tell me the same thing each and every day, or that parking lot out my seventh floor window - i seem to have dozens of pictures of both, but unfortunately very little patience or discipline to carry out the task daily, at the same time. i think a photography exhibit by myself would have to be more ridiculous and less meaningful - like pictures of all of the garbage cans on Eglinton Ave.

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

say hi to the monkey, the monkey likes you


you can spank the monkey online now eh.

Monday, August 01, 2005

parkeharrison


some of the most brilliant photography i've seen in a long time - Parkeharrison.

the people behind this make these incredibly realistic photographs, putting a very interesting artistic twist into each one, but very interestingly make the photographs seem as though they are hundreds of years old.

too cool.

http://www.parkeharrison.com/