the end of the Blogger Bike Week challenge

although technically anyone who wants to report in still has a couple of hours to do so, i'm officially marking the end of the challenge from my part. please excuse the terrible cell-phone quality of Agent Orange there - it's tired and trying to sleep.

today's ride was cut short by... you guessed it: more rain storms! i'd hoped to hit at least 50 kms, but i'll have to make do.

• Total Distance: 46.376 km
• Max Speed: 38.6 km/h
• Avg Speed: 22.9 km/h
• Total Time: 2:01:46
• Calories Burned: 1520.0
• Calories from Fat Burned: 186

i did get to see a few interesting things today. at one point i saw a crew trying to lift the frame for an in-ground pool with a crane over a person's house. i watched and secretly hoped to see it come crashing down, but in the 10 minutes i waited around they didn't get it more than a foot off the ground. also at three different points in my ride some local little kids tried their damnedest to race me on their little bmx bikes.

SO, now that it's all said and done, here's the grand totals for me for the week:

• Total Distance: 165.82 km (103.04 miles)
• Max Speed: 44.6 km/h (27.7 miles per hour) on wednesday
• Avg Speed: 21.8 km/h (13.5 miles per hour)
• Total Time: 7:35:37
• Calories Burned: 5336
• Calories from Fat Burned: 631.8

if i had driven that distance during the week (and i'm sure i would have) my car would have burned approximately 11 liters of gas (about 3 gallons) which would have cost me close to $15 and would have produced 26.4 kg (about 58.2 lbs) in carbon dioxide emissions. in return, i've been eating more (yay for eating!), sleeping better (yay for sleeping) and enjoying my commute. heck, even when that guy hit me with his car yesterday i enjoyed shouting at him. it felt good to just explode on the guy.

although i know that completely abandoning my car while living in the city is next to impossible, i think i'm going to try to keep this up a bit. this week i didn't use my car and either walked or biked to where i needed to go. i found that a 10 minute drive to the mall is actually only about a 15 minute walk - and there's no frustration in the parking garage. i realized that a 5 minute drive to the grocery store is a 10 minute walk. if i keep this up, i'll drop the office belly in no time.

anyone who took park should either post their result in the comments here, or on your own blog or website and i'll link back to you.

yesterday was.... interesting?

in theory, i should have posted this yesterday but my internet connection's been down more times than a thai hooker.

... waits for laughter ...

... still waiting ...

so yesterday i decided to go to work early. anyone in corporate north america knows that this is a big mistake - one should NEVER go to work early.

about 5 minutes into my bike ride as i'm riding down what would normally is a very quiet street, something hit me.

"what, the fact that it's dumb to go to work early?"

no, a gold toyota camry - it hit me while i was on my bike.

it threw me off balance but i managed to not hit the ground. at this point, i became filled with rage.

i dropped my bike to the ground, turn around and start shouting at the driver of the car. "what in the FUCK do you think you're doing? you fucking IDIOT!"

i see an elderly asian man sitting in the driver seat trying to motion to me that everything was okay and he'd just drive around me like he attempted to before, but managed to hit me and my bike instead.

so i slam my fist down on the hood of his car and shout "get the FUCK out of your god damned CAR you stupid piece of SHIT!"

three security guards from the mall i was passing happened to see the whole thing and one of them knocks on the window and persuades the man to get out of his car.

i lose it again.

"you fucking saw me in front of you, you stupid asshole! what the fuck do you think you're doing?!?! i've never seen a more stupid piece of shit in my fucking life, how fucking dare you hit me with your fucking car"

this went on for several minutes. me shouting, swearing and lecturing this guy while he attempted to apologize in his broken english. most of his attempts to speak were quickly stopped by me saying "shut your fucking mouth and fucking listen to me"

at one point he even tried to say it was an accident. it's not like he couldn't see me - he was trying to pass me and cut in front of me. well, he was either doing that or trying to kill me. i'm hoping that he was just trying to cut me off though.

at one point in my shouting, swearing lecture one of the security guards said to me "sir, i don't think you need to be speaking to him like that."

"I CAN SPEAK TO HIM HOWEVER THE FUCK I WANT TO! HE HIT ME WITH HIS FUCKING CAR!" was my response.

once i calmed down, i looked myself over - no scrapes, cuts or bruises. check my bike - the chain fell off, but that was about it - a minor little scrape on one of the seat stays.

i looked over at his car - large orange scrape on his gold camry was the only battle scar on his side.

i decided that because i wasn't injured and my bike wasn't injured, there was probably very little to no point in calling the police as it would likely result in a 20+ minute wait only to find that the guy wouldn't be charged because there was no injury or real damage.

SO

here are my totals for the day eh:

• Total Distance: 24.516 km
  
• Max. Speed: 40.5 km/h
• Avg. Speed: 22.1 km/h
• Total Time: 1:06:37
• Calories Burned: 806.0
• Calories from Fat Burned: 95.4

i originally planned to do 30, but i saw the UPS truck that i knew i had missed earlier today. i ran over and talked to the driver - he still had my package.

huh-huh. i said package.

but, what he had for me was my new shoes:


pretty sweet eh? now when i go out for a run, i can do so without foot pain. New Balance 747 cross trainers. frickin awesome. i tried them out today. they kick some major ass.

when enough is enough

someone needs to really express an important concern to both Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker:

Stop Making Movies.

because every time those to fuck-nuts get together they say "hey, let's make a shitty movie a guy whose english isn't great and a guy that talks funny!"

it's up to you to guess which is which.

on a lighter note, here's my totals for the day:

• Total Distance: 25.650 km
• Max. Speed: 42.2 km/h
• Avg. Speed: 21.6 km/h
• Total Time: 1:11:28
• Calories Burned: 808.0
• Calories Burned from Fat: 95.1
  

forgot me totals eh

so if i had left for work 20 minutes earlier this morning, I would have arrived just as the rain started.  instead i arrived just as the rain was ending, drenched.  due to the lack of fenders on my bike, i had the good ol' mud-stripe up my back.

here's yesterday's totals:

• Total Distance:  24.116 km
• Max. Speed:  44.6 km/h
• Avg. Speed:  22.1 km/h
• Total Time:  1:05:31
• Total Calories Burned:  770.6
• Total Calories Burned from Fat:  92.7

I would have made it to 25 km except just before i was going to do my last trip around the block a bug flew in my eye.  sorry, no pictures - i couldn't get one with the bug in focus.  it was insane though, i could not get it out while on my bike.  i had to go inside, see it in the mirror and wash it out in the sink.  more gooder, all the time.

 

sometimes i wish my cycling computer thingy didn't tell me about the calories burned from fat.  that total is rather pathetic when you compare it against the rest of the numbers.

 

 

new shoes and no hassle?

i know eh!  how in the hell did i manage to buy new shoes with no hassle?  it's pretty awesome actually.  my company has an employee program called "Work Perks" that gets me deals at a bunch of different places - one of which is New Balance. 

 

i checked out their website and realized that they have an amazing return policy, coupled with a ridiculous variety of sizes.  i found a pair of shoes that i didn't find to be too retarded looking and ordered away.  best of all - no tax and free shipping so not only do i save the hassle of going to a shoe store or the mall only to be told "sorry dude, we don't carry 13 wide", but i also save some cash in the process.  finally i can retire my nike bastards (and their similar in appearance vans counterparts).

 

also, my luck with rain this week is not getting better.  we've got more thunder storms a-brewing right now and yes, i did in fact ride my bike into the office again.  in theory, it will be shiny and clean by the time this week is over now that it's been rained on for 3 straight days.  in reality, i'll have to take it in to get serviced because even if the rain washes off all the dirt it'll leave all the moving parts dry and potentially rusting (does aluminum rust?  i hope not).

3 more meals, easily

so, i made enough food so that i don't have to cook anything for the next 3 meals. and if i develop a taste for cold pasta then i don't even have to reheat it. yup. nothing like cold pasta with meat sauce.

currently there is lightning and rain outside. these are not terribly unusual things, but for some reason the chihuahua feels the need to run to the window every time it flashes and bark at it. maybe he thinks there's some crazy dude outside with a camera, and it's his flash. maybe he's protecting me from that.

of course, i'm not sure why anyone would want to take pictures of me right now. i haven't shaved in a couple of weeks, i'm not wearing any socks and i have a blister on my foot.

here's today's totals:

• Total Distance: 21.239 km
  
• Max Speed: 36.2 km/h
  
• Avg. Speed: 20.9
  
• Total Time: 1:00:59
  
• Calories Burned: 656.6
  
• Calories Burned from Fat: 76
  

a little bit less than yesterday, but it was raining today for a good portion of it, so that's my excuse.

day two! although there was no day one total, so it could be day one

so what the hell is up with people ringing my doorbell? do they have no concept that i won't answer?

so today, here are my bike week totals:

• Total Distance: 23.918 km
• Max Speed: 38.1 km/h
• Avg. Speed: 20.8 km/h
• Total Time: 1:09:16
• Calories Burned: 774.8
• Calories from Fat Burned: 86.6

I should have gone around the block one more time to bring the total up to 25 km, but i wasn't paying attention.

now i shall watch movies and consume popcorn.

wherefor art thou ozone?

although the weather network tells me that it's only 27 degrees out today, my cycling computer tells me that it's 34. thankfully i remembered to apply generous amounts of sunscreen before i left.

this morning's prep ride yielded the following results:

• Total Distance: 12.6 km
• Max Speed: 44.8 km/h
• Avg. Speed: 23.4 km/h
• Total Time: 32:32
• Calories Burned: 410.9
• Calories from Fat Burned: 51

because i've read in numerous places that you're supposed to refuel yourself after any workout, my refuel snack was 1 peach (approx. 40 calories), 1 glass of OJ (110 calories) and 1 small container of caramel yogurt (100 calories). i figure as long as i eat a little less than i burn, i can hopefully get rid of some of the office belly.

i may go out again later if it cools down a bit. it's still pretty retarded hot outside though.

why do i do this to myself?

yesterday i thought "hey, i haven't been to my local bike shop* in a while. i should totally go check it out"

why do i keep doing this to myself? i have no idea. it's like going to a candy store and having no money. they had one of the bikes that i've drooled over in the past marked down to just $1100. when this bike was new i think it was in the area of $1500-$1700, but thanks to it being a previous-year model and the devalued american dollar, i get a gooder price.

even though right now i should NOT be spending a thousand dollars on anything but my credit card.

the sales guys, knowing that i'm a regular and buy all my goodies there, said to me that i could put it on layaway if i wanted to and pay off chunks at a time. i'll have to thinks aboot it i says. damn, would be nice though. tons of their other stuff was marked down too. i asked about why and they told me that when they originally priced stuff, they were going off the msrp, but because the dollar is so high they can knock it down some more. lucky me.

maybe if the weather gets to be less sticky, i'll head out for some test riding.

and don't forget to hop on your bike next week instead of drive. and tell me aboot it. i haven't determined what the prize will be for any of the categories. maybe the winner will be allowed to feed my frog his crickets. or maybe it'll be awesomer. we'll see.


* this is not the shop that i frequent while at work, but the shop where i actually buy stuff

slow like my brain

it's not awesome when work is so dead that i struggle to find something to do.  business seems to come and go in this new role.  sometimes i can be busy for two or three days straight, but at times i've got nothing to do at all.  the unfortunate thing is that the nature of my company's business keeps the majority of other people in the office tremendously busy all the time, leaving opportunities for intra-office meandering and chit chat to a minimum.  i've even exhausted what i can look at in the local bike shop here.  it's a pretty small shop and their in-store inventory is never that big so i've seen, picked up and messed around with pretty much all of what they have.  the whole "you have to be here until 5" thing sucks too.

 

i suppose i have to keep positive about it, obviously it could be worse.  i could be stuck at the "you have to be here until 5" job and still have to commute for an hour and a half after that.  at least at this place i'm close enough to either ride my bike or drive for less than 15 mins to get home.

 

actually, if i ride my bike i can get here in 18 minutes.  i'm not quite sure how it works that in my car it takes me 15 but on the bike is 18.  i think it may have to do with the pace that i ride - it must cause me to miss out on most of the stop lights.  next week i intend to ride my bike exclusively - rain or shine - thereby reducing my carbon footprint to almost nothing.

 

well, maybe not.  i keep the a/c in my house cranked pretty high.  riding my bike will probably just balance that out.  barely.

no iPhone for me

i'm glad i didn't stand in line for hours, or days, or months even.

 

or even a few minutes.

 

i just got off the phone with Fido, my cell phone provider, because i wanted to buy an iPhone.  unfortunately because i renewed my contract last year i am NOT eligible for renewal at this point, so i'll have to wait until 2009 if i want one.  fuckin fuckers.

 

on a brighter note, there are at least two people in my office singing brutally butchered versions of songs that i enjoy from their original artists.

 

in the meantime, make sure you join me in my challenge.  Hänni's taking part, and if she's taking part then everyone else should too.  i'm giving up on my car for the week and doing everything by bicycle that week.  i figure it'll save me about $30-$40 in gas based on the cost at the pump this morning.

the grand challenge

this summer i feel like i haven't been spending enough time riding my bike - so i'm challenging the cyclists out there who actually read this.

 

i haven't decided if there will be a prize associated with it.  if there is a prize, it will be something simple and likely be based largely on bragging rights.  i'm officially declaring July 20-26 to be Blogger Bike Week (and yes, i intentionally picked something that would have the abbreviation of BBW).  the only thing you'll need to take part is you, your bike and your bike computer thingy (you know, the one that tells you how far you've gone and how fast you're going).

 

prize categories include:

• most kilometers travelled (or for any american, miles converted into km's) for the duration of the week
• highest max speed
• highest average speed
• longest individual trip

anyone who wants to take part, send me an email to welfarebum @ gmail.com with Blogger Bike Week in the subject.  feel free to spread the word around to anyone you may think who wants to take part.  this is a largely "for fun" thing.  send pics, details about you and your ride, etc.  everyone who joins up will be featured here in a sort of mini-bio.  maybe i'll involve some sort of charity component too - or that can be part of the prizes or something.  if there's enough interest, i'll create a web page where you can log in and keep track of your daily stats.

 

who's in?

hey, the Ride for Heart was like a week ago eh?

so yeah, ride for heart.  sorry, i've been pretty busy and since the new job is pretty restricted as far as internet access goes i haven't had time to post aboot this.

 

to start things off, i am seriously out of shape.  the furthest ride i've done so far this year is about 20 km, so needless to say this was gonna be something.

 

sunday june 1st was the ride for heart, and as everyone knows, i signed up for the 75 km (about 46 miles) ride.  i started near the front of the pack, which i'm sure was irritating to the hardcore bike dorks, at 6:45am.  it was a windy 13 degrees (55 degrees for americans).

 

as i headed out, i thought to myself "hey, i'm keeping up a decent pace - i'm about 10 km/h ahead of my regular speed".

 

that was for the first 5 km.

 

as the back headed off the gardiner expressway on the way up the don valley parkway, the wind got started up again, and we all proceeded to ride the uphill route from the lakeshore to york mills into the wind.

 

coming back down the DVP was nice, as i managed to register a new high speed of 55.6 km/h on my bike computer thingy.  of course, it was a steep downhill and i was pedaling as hard as i could, but hey, still neat-o in my opinion.  the slowest speed i registered?  8.8 km/h coming back up the bayview/bloor on-ramp.

 

after i passed the 65 km point my arse was seriously hurting and my legs were seriously tired.  then the winds started back up.  from the moment i got back on the gardiner expressway all the way to the finish line the winds were nasty, making the last 10 or so km very tiring.

 

when i crossed the finish line, i checked out my bike computer thingy for some stats:

 

total distance:  81 km

max speed:  55.6 km/h

avg speed:  19.8 km/h

total time:  4:05:36

calories burned: 2599

 

last time i checked, 81 was quite a bit more than 75.  at least by my terms.  and really, i should have just done the 50.  but i did finish and was happy that i managed to keep my average speed near 20 km/h.  i'm pretty sure that the big downhill helped with that though.

 

walking around the exhibition grounds, i could feel my muscles start to tighten and get sore.  i must have smelled great.

 

i did a quick once-around the grounds on the search for Martini, but gave up when i realized that i was hunting through thousands of people and my legs hurt from being out of practise.  next year dude, we'll co-ordinate better and have a beer afterwards.

four shalt thou NOT count

four days. that's it.

i've been training my replacement at job number one for the last while, and although i'm not quite convinced he's 100% ready, he'll have to do. i am far too excited about the fact that my trip to work will no longer be ridiculous like it was this morning.

it took me more than 90 minutes to get gas and drive the 45 km from door to frickin door. I've also estimated that based on the current price of gas that it's going to cost me between $44 and $50 this week to get to and from job number one. when taking multiple transit systems becomes more cost effective than driving to work, you know you've got a problem.

but that problem will be short lived. only a couple more days to go. i'm looking forward to being able to ride my bike to work on a regular basis. i've literally put less than 100 km on my bike since the start of the warm weather because of the commute and 2 job thing and am going to need to get some major riding in to be able to finish the 75 km in the Ride for Heart on June 1st (Martini - you should totally switch and do the 75 km instead of the 50 - all the cool kids are doing it. and by all i mean me).

---

what?!? you haven't sponsored me for the ride for heart yet? well then click below and make sure you do that already...

Visit my sponsorship page to see my progress!!

technically i suppose it's thirty weeks now

but even if it's 30 weeks, i've still only posted 29 times


sometimes when i overhear my boss at job number 1 talking on the phone, it makes me want to hit him in the head with it. he's a completely non-technical person trying to explain a technical thing that he has no real understanding of.

grammar is something i apparently have no understanding of.

i think i REALLY want this - the Epiphone SG Prophecy EX. yeah, i know, it's not a Gibson technically, but it might just as well be. especially since Gibson doesn't offer the SG in that style, and even if they did it would cost like $3500, and i'm not a good enough guitar player to spend that kind of money on a musical instrument.

i also really like this bike - the Devinci Tosca SL 2, but i've promised myself that i'm not going to let myself buy a bike unless i put at least another 2000 km on mine. in theory, that shouldn't be too difficult - i'd like to be at a pace where i'm putting between 150-250 km a week on my bike this summer because it's my goal to lose the office belly that seems to have accompanied this especially cold winter. that and it's just real fun and all.

also, if I raise just $25 more in sponsorship money for the Ride for Heart, i'll be eligible for a draw for a sony home theater system. that would certainly be nice because the home theater system i have right now doesn't work sometimes. it takes about 20-30 clicks of the button to get the power to go on, and when it does go on the DVD player slows down sometimes so everyone starts talking funny. and not haha funny, but funny like the opposite of the chipmunks.

another effort for me to raise money for this - from now until the ride, if you buy a t-shirt hell shirt through my link here, i'll take my referral money and put it into sponsorship dollars.

i know, some of it is a little too offensive to be caught wearing, but there are some decent ones too:

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what?!? you haven't sponsored me for the ride for heart yet? well then click below and make sure you do that already...

Visit my sponsorship page to see my progress!!

from one charity to another

after some evaluation, i've decided that it's pretty unlikely that i'm going to be able to reach the $2500 goal for the ride to conquer cancer that I was thinking aboot earlier, so i've decided to focus my efforts on the Becel Ride for Heart.

On June 1st I'm going to be taking part in the Becel Ride for Heart. Is there a certain amount of irony in a charity for the Heart and Stroke Foundation being sponsored by a margarine producing company? I think so.

Anyhoo, I'll be doing the 75 km ride which goes from the Exhibition grounds up to York Mills road on the DVP and back. For anyone considering taking part, there are 3 different rides - a 25 km, a 50 km and a 75 km ride, all along the Gardiner Expressway and the DVP.

For anyone who doesn't want to or can't take part, feel free to sponsor me and pass around my sponsorship link to anyone you know:

https://secure.heartandstroke.ca/faf/donorReg/donorPledge.asp?ievent=265808&lis=1&supId=208742731

I'll be the guy on the orange bike somewhere near the back of the group, trying hard to keep up.

an opportunity to be a conqueror

i'm considering taking part in the Ride to Conquer Cancer. it's a 200 km bike ride split across two days from downtown Toronto to Niagara Falls. the sponsorship requirements are a little high - you need to raise $2500 to take part - but i think i have enough time to do it if i hit up people at both jobs.

my question to the bicycle riding internet: is there anyone out there who would be willing to join me if i were to create a team? i don't plan on riding overly fast. in fact, i'm just out of shape enough that i will probably be towards the end of the pack. what i'm looking for essentially is to get a couple of days on my bike and to raise money for a good cause.

if you or somone you know is interested in raising a ton of money and riding your (or their) bike for two days, let me know either via comment or email me at untastic@gmail.com.

the basics of the ride: 100 km each day, the first night will be spent camping in Hamilton. there are pit stops every 25-30 kms with snacks and drinks. when you reach Niagara Falls, if you don't have someone to pick you up, you have the option of taking the train back - more info here. there's an option for the faster riders (which i am not) to do an extra 50 km after the first day's riding with Canadian professional cyclist Steve Bauer.

so like i said, let me know if you want to join a team with me. should be loads of fun eh.

the morning bike ride to work

well, the morning bike ride to job #2 anyways. haven't quite gotten myself up to the point where i can ride to job #1 yet becuase it's more than three times as far, but here's some of the details:

• Total Distance: 12.969 km
• Max Speed: 39.7 km/h
• Avg Speed: 20.7 km/h
• Total Time: 37 mins 36 seconds
• Calories Burned: 374.7

so by the time i go home, i will have burned approximately 750 calories. by my count, that's a medium oreo blizzard from Dairy Queen with some room to spare. If i was choosing to eat something healthy, i could eat 13 apples instead of the 1 blizzard, but that wouldn't come anywhere close to filling my ice cream needs.

sticky, sweaty day

because i was scheduled to work today, i missed out on the Ride for Heart, so instead of riding for heart, i rode my bike to work.

thanks to my handy-dandy speedometer thingy, i realized when i got to work that the temperature was a balmy 29 degrees celcius, and most of the ride felt like i was riding throught a warm, wet paper towel. all in all though, i still very much prefer riding my arse-kicking Trek 7.3 FX bike to work than driving any day of the week. fitness-wise, i'm probably about two or three weeks behind riding the 75 kms that i wanted to do in the Ride for Heart anyways.

i've realized that for job number two, i should probably take some french lessons. after a few calls come into the office, it makes me realize that 10 years of not speaking french has easily undone the 15 years of french classes that i've taken in my life. even the simplest of words seem to slip from my mind when i'm stumbling through a conversation in french - who knew that "manually" becomes "manuellement"?

well, i suppose i could have guessed, but then i figured i'd sound like an idiot making up french words. what ended up happening was me sounding like an idiot by NOT making up french words.

sometimes i rhyme slow

two weeks ago today was the last time i posted something here. i knew that i've been busy, but wasn't entirely aware that my goofing-off-interneting time had been so seriously impacted.

in that time the weather finally warmed up and i've spent a ridiculous amount of time working. the only cool thing about working so much is that my two-year debt reduction plan is actually making a visible impact on the amount of money i have to pay out in bills every month.

hopefully this week i'm going to be bringing my bike out of seasonal retirement. i've kept a winter layer of padding around my belly that i'd like to get rid of. i'm quite anxious to hop on to my Trek 7.3 FX (Martini was asking what kind i had) and get out riding, though i know i'm going to have to take it easy at first because i've gotten myself out of shape this winter.

i'm gonna do some of the upgrades that i mentioned earlier - put some good grips and bar-ends on it, and maybe those pedals that clip onto the bottom of your shoes (which would mean that i've got to buy shoes too darn it). it's been a pretty good bike so far. i abuse it like a mountain bike, but it rides pretty quickly. it's no race bike, but it gets the job done well at a good price. certainly something i'd recommend to someone who was thinking of taking their bicycle as an option to commute to work.

i'm debating doing another long trip this year like i did last year, but giving myself an extra day or two to do it so i don't kill myself riding 300 km on the hottest days of the summer (again).

this morning i went to the effort of making a pot of coffee and even putting it in my travel mug. that travel mug is still sitting on my kitchen counter, so now i have to drink crummy work coffee. the pope would be very angry.